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The YOMs Are Back! (And That’s Not a Good Thing)
You may be aware that The Alliance of Professional Health Advocates maintains a list of mentors – people who have worked in private advocacy for long enough, and who have become successful enough, to be willing to, and able, to mentor advocate wannabes – those of you who want to become the best advocate you can be, but understand there are limitations to your knowledge that will get in the way of your success. Our listed mentors are professionals who are paid for their expertise, education, and advice by those who want to learn from them. Hold that thought. We all know there are people “out there” who think they are – or at least behave as if they are – entitled. Entitled to anything at all – entitled to park in a handicap parking space (when they aren’t handicapped), entitled to move to the front of the line, entitled to help themselves to something they should be paying for, even, simply, entitled to interrupt or even bully others. Their attitude is, what I call, YOM: You Owe Me I call such insistant bullies YOMs. Almost five years ago I wrote my first YOM post: YOMs and That Sense of Entitlement which focused on patients / potential clients who try to bully an advocate or care professional into helping them, or at the least, into providing them with information for free. They feel entitled to that help – but they are not. The post focuses on typical demands of advocates, and how advocates can respond to them. The bottom line is that no advocate should be bullied into doing anything s/he does not want to do for someone who is not a client. Now, back to our mentors. In a conversation recently with one of our mentors, she lamented that she has been contacted recently by advocate wannabes who are behaving like YOMs – as if they are entitled to her time and expertise. Here are two examples: She receives emails telling her (not asking!) to “call me next Tuesday at 11 am so we can talk more about this.”…